50 ways to be the Nightmare Girlfriend..

Autumn did a bulletin on My Space with her views on "50 things she wishes you knew". So, I went to the web page and took a look.

These lists are dumb..
Not every woman is the same
Men should not follow these lists

So, as I should be studying for tomorrows exams, of course I'm going to procastinate and give my views. Heres the list, with my comments attached

1. Saying "I love you" immediately before, during, or following sex doesn't count. - It does count, in fact it's hot, but it's nice to hear it at other times too.

2. Real men drive stick shift. - I don't care what you drive although the majority in the UK drive a stick, so what..

3. I will leave if you lie. - Lyings a no-no, but leaving depends on what it is and why.

4. You are cute in raglan-sleeved T-shirts (two-toned baseball undershirts).- You are cute in anything.

5. I'm convinced I'm pregnant and obsess about it for a minimum of 24 to 48 hours before my period, even when I have no rational reason to think so. - Sometimes thinking about worse case scenario is inevitable, but not always.

6. I love it when you hug me from behind and whisper in my ear. - Agreed.

7. "Fine" is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look. - I don't ask. Its nice when a guy comments on what you're wearing without being asked but theres no point asking if the guy has learnt that "You look fantastic" is the correct response and just says it.

8. Most of the time when I fantasize, it's about you. - If I'm into a guy, he's all I fantasise about.

9. I'm terrified of becoming my mother, even though I admire her.- My mum rocks, if I end up half the woman she is, I'd be happy.

10. I get turned on simply seeing that I have an e-mail from you. - Agreed. I have girly moments so shoot me..

11. I expect you to call me. - At least sometimes, same with emailing. I don't like being first ALL the time but communication is a two way thing.

12. Only rock stars are allowed to wear leather pants. - Not even rock stars.

13. I'm scared of losing my independence.- Lost it years ago as soon as I had kids.

14. I'm more forgiving of you than I really should be. - True.

15. Oral sex is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free card. Manolo Blahnik shoes also do the trick. - While I'll never say no to oral sex, its not essential. If you're in the dog house, admitting you were wrong works. Then you can go down on me..Oh and no shoes, boots maybe and some undies would be preferable.

16. You did something bad. I seem cool with it. I'm not. (See directly above.) Why does this woman advocate playing games?

17. If I'm not having sex with you, I'm... a. ...having a fat day. b. ...not feeling "connected" to you. c. ...blackmailing you to get something I want. If Im not having sex with you it's because I dont feel like it although with you that wouldn't happen. Again, not all women use sex as a game/ punishment.

18. Shoes determine whether you're fashionable or not.- No they don't

19. I own a Debbie Gibson CD, and I'm not afraid to use it. Uh..what? why?

20. When I compare my flabby tummy to a kangaroo pouch, say nothing.- Say nothing if you agree or Im being a whinging bitch. Saying you like my mummy tummy and kissing it all over to prove it does nicely

21. A man I love plans the occasional fancy-schmancy dress-up date and impromptu weekend getaways, and he buys my favorite candy in advance when we're just going to the movies. - Not required, by me anyway. Being thoughtful in normal ways is better. Like topping up the gas in your car, making sure I know where Im going in a unfamiliar city, making sure Im safe

22. You look hot in hooded clothing items. - You'd look like a dork in hooded clothing..

23. You should never tell me what to do. - Why not? If I don't know tell me. Oh, and I love it when your masterful...

24. If I slept over, you owe me breakfast. - You wouldn't have the time to make me breakfast..

25. My breasts love much licking and sucking. - Obviously

26. If you ask me out directly, I will say yes. - Unless I don't like you, then I'll say no

27. I'm very impressed when you ask for my advice. - Why wouldn't you. Geez the girl that wrote this has problems..

28. I'm unimpressed with a man who doesn't take the lead. - Again a two way thing

29. When in doubt, go with the shirt that matches your eye color.- Wear what you're comfortable in, you'll look hot

30. I want to be Madonna. - No, I don't, really

31. Women get urinary-tract infections easily, so watch (and wash) your fingers. - I'm not a china doll, normal hygiene will suffice

32. I'm in heaven when you hold my hand.- It's nice, very nice sometimes but in heaven may be a slight exaggeration

33. You're sexy when you're shaving, fixing things, wearing a white T-shirt and jeans, driving, eating a peach, holding a baby. - You're always sexy

34. I need to hear how you feel about me. Often. Tell me now. - I'd rather an infrequent compliment when you really mean it than daily compliments cos you think you should. When a guy who doesn't compliment much then says something sweet, it means far more.

35. Surprises, especially gifts for moi = more loving. - I love you anyway, you don't have to buy me

36. I want to be the best thing that ever happened to you--and for you to recognize this. - The girl that wrote this is clingy, needy and neurotic

37. If I'm not feeling loved, I will start looking....No I won't. I'll probably jump you as you walk through the door.

38. Discussion of ex-gf's and ex-bf's should be avoided at all times. - Continual references maybe, but we've all had a past.

39. I like it when you tell me what you're thinking, even if you don't know yourself. - How can you tell me if you don't know?

40. Celebrating our anniversary, even if it's only been a few months, earns major bonus points. - Months? get real.

41. I love it when you're sweaty. - This depends. If you've got in from the gym, go shower. If you're lying on top of me, out of breath and sweaty, thats different..

42. It's best to consult your gal pals for gift ideas. - If you want to go ahead, if its from you Ill love it. If not, Ill take it back..

43. A lady should always be greeted with kisses. - Who wants to be a lady? OK, seriously, kisses are nice, if you mean them

44. I like porn. - Yep

45. I love holding your bum in the palms of my hands. - I love touching you anywhere

46. Even nice girls like hushed dirty talk in public. - I can't comment, I'm not a nice girl..

47. It's cheating as soon as you're doing something with her that you wouldn't want me to see, hear, read...- probably

48. For the record: I'd rather you break up with me than cheat. - thats kinda obvious

49. I remember everything about our relationship. - I remember the very good and the very bad. I doubt I remember everything

50. You should know all this and more without my telling you. - Really, no, you shouldn't know some of these cos they're crap

This woman reveals some of the worst no-nos in a relationship. Lighten up! Have fun and stop playing games with your bloke. This reminds me of the movie, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. The same mistakes are made over and over and dumb lists like this prove it.