As one goes out and another comes in..

Another year about over and I'm sat pondering on 2006. It was an ok year as years go

Some highlights of 2006 were

Work wise:

I did well out of the NHS job description and pay reforms. Got graded up as a specialist nurse and got a very healthy raise with it

I got my Diploma in Clinical Practice and enough CAT points to do my degree

I got given more managerial responsibility then my grade should allow

Fun wise:

I went to Paris

I met some online friends, Shaun from Lincolnshire and Helly from LA

Family wise:

My girls are happy and doing well in school

My parents, brother and sister are healthy and happy

Personally:

I began to believe in me

I met some great friends

I am happy

so, I'm not making any actual resolutions because I'll break them but in 2007 I intend to

Go to the US

Stop smoking completely, using the motivation of needing money for my trip

Continue to eat healthily

Try not to cry when Bethan goes to High School in September

Help Jessica pick the right subject options for her GCSEs

Continue to believe in me and continue to believe I deserve to be happy

Pick my degree course and start saving for it

Have more stuff in my funwise section next year...

Write some better blogs

Stay in touch with and value the friendships I have made

Get out more - yep, I put that in for someone in particular who keeps telling me that

Heres a cute pic of Bethan, my baby all growed up, in the birthday outfit we shopped for yesterday. She'll be 11 on the 16th January

Birthday Wishes

Its 1am here so officially the 29th December
A Happy 36th birthday to my bestest friend Brian. At last you're as old as me..

Have a good day and don't work too hard

Here's a little Christina in a hot tub waiting for you

and some pudgy Christina, just the way you like her

Hmm, Justin, how did he get there?...

This was my Christmas, how was yours?

So, all over for another year

Christmas Day was good. No better or worse than previous years. As they get older, the girls' presents get smaller in size and way more expensive. Girls got on all day and didn't fight. There was even a sweet scene where they were both led on the settee and wise and worldly daughter #1 was teaching clueless daughter #2 how to use her new mobile phone. Even more miraculous was the fact that I spent all day in the company of their dad and we didn't fight either...

Boxing day was the usual tradition of going to my parents. However,my sister's youngest was ill so she didn't come and my brother had gone to watch Newport County play football (well, someone has to...) so it was just them and us. Girls got bored quickly and started bickering - knew it couldn't last

My presents. Usually I get off my parents and off my outlaws. I then buy myself stuff for the kids to give me. But this year I'm going to the US so saved all my money to book my flights next week. My mum bought me clothes that I loved. But I saved the best till last.
My MIL has never quite forgiven me for rejecting her precious son and chooses my presents with tender loving hate. Honestly, I wish she'd stop buying but it obviously gives her so much enjoyment. It's now a standing joke between me and the girls. Tradition even.
Previous years have seen me receive perfume called Cheap, a top that we never figured out whether it was a blouse or nightwear and PJs in a size 14-16. I'm a 10 (British 10 which I think is an American 6)
This year didn't disappoint - 2 tops in size 14 and perfume I last wore 20 years ago...Whats worse is they were obviously expensive - just give me the money!!

I also watched TV. Now, everyone knows by now I never watch TV. Until January 9th of course - Battlestar Gallactica Season 3 baby!!...
But I relented and watched with the girls. Plus none of you buggers were online to talk to me anyway.
So, I watched Strictly Come Dancing - The Final and the Christmas special. Nice eye candy.
I watched Nightmare before Christmas (love it), Surviving Christmas, a lame Christmas
feel-good film where I predicted the end 5 minutes in. But, it had Ben Affleck in it so..
I also watched Chicken Run, Chicken Little and Narnia
Oh, and High School Musical (shudder)

I also have 11 Christmas bought DVDs to watch. We're big film fans in this house...

But one thing I still miss about Christmas TV is Noel Edmunds on Christmas morning. As Pete is my only British reader he'll understand this. Pete, tell me you used to watch it and cry?

The girls are off school till the 8th and I think I'm alone for New Year. Or Ill have Bethan but she'll be asleep. New years' TV is worse than Christmas TV...

But I'm thinking of watching the BG DVDs back to back in preparation for the new series. And consuming alcohol as well of course

And definitely NO New Years' resolutions

Sexy Santa, Sexy Santa stripping, Everard Cunion Living Dolls....

Google update...

The past 7-10 days has sent many, many, many, (yes, that many!) people to my blog. And what are they searching for?

Sexy Santa's helpers
Santa stripping
Sexy Santa
Everard Cunion - dolls - (heres the link with the link for the doll shop if you want it)

Dirty perverts the lot of them.....

Of course, since their perverted searches bring them here, it doesn't say a lot about me does it?

Oh and in case my Merry Christmas may have offended some, here's the amended version..


Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practised within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make the UK great, not to imply that the UK is necessarily greater than any other country, and without regard to race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishes. By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

Happy Christmas, Holidays, whatever.....

The trees' lights are sparkling, the presents are bought, wrapped, delivered or hidden ready for Santa's elves to collect. The food is nestled safely in the kitchen cupboards. The table full of chocolates is placed far to near my computer desk. My 13 year old is trying hard to be cool but her eyes keep darting to the friends and families' presents under the tree. My 10 year old is not even attempting to be cool and is wound up like a top. She's shaken and felt every present under the tree and her hyperactiveness is not helping my hangover one bit. Yes, it's 8pm and I still have a hangover...

So, with just 2 days to go, I hope everyone has a great time. And if you're not going to, and I know for a few of my friends it wont be, I hope it goes as quickly and painlessly as possible.

Santa Revealed..

Mmmm yummy, need I say more..

And a double treat for the Santa's sexy little helper

Thank you for filling my stocking - you guys know me all too well..

Fill My Stocking

Be my Santa baby..
Fill my stocking with a pressie, and it won't cost you a thing!

Xmas Stocking

leave a gift for Lisa your username: your gift: (30 characters or less) get your stocking

Anyone Getting Bored Yet? - Day 4

A very oily Santa - I think he needs that oil rubbing in a bit, especially the bit on his left upper thigh - I could do that...

And the ever so helpful wholesome Helpers

Santa Stripping Day 3...

Mmmm, Santa can come down my chimney with his sack....(joke courtesy of Brian-who else?)


And buy one get one free in the sexy helpers

Oh and weird as it is to post this with semi naked adults

Happy 2nd Birthday to the Monkey. Hopefully daddy went without his gin and bought you something nice instead.

Santa Strip Day 2

Seems Santa works out. And there's a tanning salon in the North Pole - who'd have thunk?

And the sexy Santa's Helper - bet she cant walk in those heels

Santa Striptease Day 1

This should be a post about my pain meds and my ass but I really think you had to be there, or maybe not - suffice to say, I now feel extremely sorry for my patients and will be much kinder when inserting things into their rectum in future. I also now understand even less the whole hamster in the ass thing but there you go.

So, as requested, The Santa Strip - Stayed tuned every day for more of less

Day One

And for my male readers, or should I say my heterosexual male readers, here's a little Santa's Helper for you

Christmas Cripple...

I have committed the ultimate Nursing sin. No, I haven't killed anyone, it's worse than that...

I'm off sick for Christmas

I returned to work on Tuesday night after 4 weeks off. Within 2 hours my nagging back pain once again became complete agony. I managed to drag myself through my 12 hour night shift.

I don't usually talk about work, but I'll give a general outline of my shift. I admitted a 27 year old lad with sepsis of unknown cause. He'd been born with congenital heart problems and had the weirdest heart plumbing I'd ever seen. Just as we were about to tube him, he said "Can I said Goodbye to my parents?". That just got to me. " No," says I, "I'll go and get them and you can say see you soon". I hope I'm right. I spent all night fiddling with his Vent settings cos he wasn't ventilating properly. He was fighting it, so I was upping his sedation to get the fine line just right. We put lines in him, filled him with fluid, started NorAd and upped and upped it to get his pressures up. All this while popping more and more pain meds to get me through. By the time I got home I could hardly walk - great..

So, I'm off again. More physio, more pain meds (I'm not even going to tell you where I have to insert them, work that one out yourself....), more time off work

So, I have a slightly guilt ridden Christmas off.

And the girls won't let me forget it for the rest of the year....

On a lighter note, I have been asked to post my stripping Santa again this year. As well as the stripping Santa I will bow to the pressure of a disgruntled male reader and also post a scantily clad sexy Santa's helper each day too.

So, next week, Monday to Friday - Tottie time

All I want for Christmas...

My Christmas wishlist is....

A new Mobile Phone cos mine broke 2 weeks ago

A Plane Ticket

A new digital camera
Some nice new undies
A dressing gown

Lots of Smirnoff Ice

And a kiss....


So, if you see Santa, tell him I've been a very, very good girl this year. I think the top 2 are sorted but he may have to help with the rest...

My Christmas Laminate List

I was going to say I'll have any one of these in my stocking. But that sounded kinda kinky. So, me in the stockings, men naked..

1

Ewan Macgregor

2

Nathan Fillion

3

Ioan Gruffudd

4

Tadd Hilgenbrinck

5

Wentworth Miller

Same sex alternate - Dita Von Teese

Blonde alternate - Daniel Craig

An Open Letter

Dear street people,

I know it's hard doing your dismal, low paying, commission centered job. It really must be shit to stand in the centre of the city and accost people as they walk by, knowing full well they want you to just piss off and leave them alone.

Today it was raining, hard. It was blustery and it was hard enough dodging the flying shop signs and placards without dodging you as well. The cold, hard hailstones hitting my face and bouncing off my head weren't pleasant either. So, today no polite smiles, no shaking of head, no excuses I have an appointment.

I'm sorry I ignored you totally. But just so you know..

I don't want a catalogue

I don't want a credit card

or a store card

I don't want to do your survey

Yes, Ive had an accident in the last 5 years but no, I really don't want to sue a man who knocked me down in the hospital car park because he wasn't concentrating cos his dad had just died.

No I don't want to save the Whale

or the Mongolian white spotted Gorilla

or the pink striped Peruvian goat

or Chinese women with herpes

I don't want to join Greenpeace

or the World Wildlife Fund (you were pretty cute though, that's a very good advertising angle)

or the Socialist Party

I don't need an invitation to go in your shop, if I want to go in, I can get there on my own

Finally, and probably most importantly, I don't want God to save me and forgive my sins. No really, I'm sure he could save at least 7 people in the time it would take to save me.

All I want is to deposit this cheque so I can finally do my christmas shopping. And find a party outfit and a couple of pairs of jeans for this sulky, picky, ever growing teenager beside me.

You have a nice day too..

The List Meme

Ive seen this on Aisbys and Natalias. Im supposed to be cleaning but Im going at it with such enthusiasm that my Hoovers overheated..

So heres mine

Those that are in bold are the ones that I have done.

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse of the moon.
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Kissed on the first date
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
92. Buried one/both of your parents
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
95. Performed in Rocky Horror
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone’s life

Google Smoogle

Google on St David's Day

In reading Allies blog about her site tracker and her new readers The Dept of Justice (They're watching you!) she mentioned how Google leads to your blog. So, I decided to look at mine and see what terms brought people to me

My site tracker is mainly people I recognise straight away. My little band of regulars. I do have them, honest, they are just very shy and don't comment....
Then throw in the mix of people that are sent to my blog from the random blog button and the bestblogger random button - they don't come back...

Anyway, back to Google - all I have to say is people Google the weirdest things. I looked at the last hundred entry links before I got bored and people have been brought to my blog by typing the following

Spooky Tales

Things to do on Friday the 13th

Snowdrop raindrop

I love my friends because

Everard Cunion

Newport Wales Skate Park

look a likeys

but my favourites have to be

Itchy Palm

Legal Monkeys (as opposed to illegal ones?)

Spot the Cylon ( Got to love a fellow Battlestar Galactica fan, but why was he wanting to know?, think he's found one..)

Funny Christmas hat in Wales (wtf did they think they were going to find??)

and my all time favourite...

All I want for Christmas is a boob job - now I expect Mariah Carey could tell them all about it but still

I fear all were bitterly disappointed when they ended up on my little blog

Bah Humbug..

Where did September, October and November go to?

Why is it suddenly less than a month to Christmas?

Decorations and lights are springing up on the neighbours' houses and Im thinking far too early, then kinda realise it's not that early.

Decorating the outside of your house with lights and whatnots is a reatively new concept over here, brought over from the US of course. But we haven't quite got the American finesse. I look at American houses on the TV and it looks sophisticated and pretty and nice. Over here it just looks tacky. I mean who the hell thinks a 6 foot inflatable snowman or santa in your front garden is classy? Combined with tacky flashing reindeers and sleighs and bells on the front of the house it's Santas' grotty rather than grotto..

Speaking of tacky, I'm sorry but I do love this song..

Now that makes me feel christmassy..

More Fun in Wales

More pics from Helly

Alex was way better than me at the pole

Note the ear-friendly distance I kept my mouth from the microphone

Helly and Alex ponder the selections

Helly Standing by her Man

Obligatory bottle blow job shot..

Smile!

Awww, we love our Shauny

Thanks guys, it was fun! I may forgive you for surprising me, but I won't forget... I'm plotting my revenge...

Heres to March

Fun in the Sun to Raving in the Rain

Just seen Helly, Shaun and Alex off after lunch and shopping. Well, Alex shopped, we watched him..

Helly swapped the sunnier climes of LA, California for wet and windy Wales

bRRRRRRR, Helly - god it's cold....

There was a reason for finding the huge umbrella as the puddles indicate

More Pics

Insomnia bites and now I cant even sleep after having a drink

So, more photos

We went for dinner at the restaurant next to the hotel. Here's Helly and Shaun with Alex.

Then I took them into the City Centre. It was really quiet, I think the torrential rain had kept normal people indoors. But it meant we had full use of the poles....

We partook in a little drinking..

I took them to one of my favourite drinking holes not realising Thursday night was Karaoke. So Helly was up there like a shot

There are more and I've emailed the link to my album to those I thought would want to see the rest. That way I dont have to bore the lot of you. However once I get Helly's pics and take some more tomorrow, I'll post some of my favourites